Control Freak

November 30, 2010 at 7:37 am | Posted in Life and Living | 17 Comments
Tags: bossy, control freak, life, order, organization

Ok, so this blog was founded on the idea of realizing things about life and yourself as you get older.  Well here’s one that fits right into that.  It’s something I truly never thought up until recently, though clearly others saw this in me before and are probably wondering, “how could I not know?”  So here it goes.  I am a control freak.

It’s the trait that helped me to graduate college in 3 years. It’s the trait that led me to set specific goals and deadlines for every increment of my life. At age 18, I’ll run the marathon.  At age 21, I’ll learn to drive stick shift.  At 27, I’ll get married.  At 30, I’ll be at the director level in my career.  Much of this has been reflected in this blog.  I’ve discussed how these plans have gone awry and I’ve discussed my drive to reach these goals.  I typically adjust accordingly.

I’m known amongst my friends as being the one who herds the group and gets us focused on the task at hand.  I’ve been called bossy, though I’d argue that I am a decision-maker.  I don’t allow myself to be pushed around.  I am stubborn, but I am flexible, but I always need a plan.  Even a basic direction, like “we’ll go to this block and figure it out,” will do.

Here’s the question I have.  Is it so bad to be a control freak?  Why does it sound so bad?  Would things get done if there wasn’t a control freak in the midst?

On behalf of all control freaks, I’d like to say that it’s not a bad thing.  I’d also like to take this opportunity to dispel any myths or misconceptions about control freaks.  Hey, it’s my blog, and I have control over the content, now don’t I?

Myth #1: Control freaks are uptight. Far from it.  I like to let loose just as much as the next girl.  Although I am a control freak, I can also be spontaneous and daring.  I do try new things.

Myth #2: Control freaks are bossy. The worse thing to a control freak is a person who can’t make decisions.  Control freaks simply try to help indecisive people make up their minds through logical situation analysis.

Myth #3: Control freaks are hard to work with. Not so.  Control freaks are highly productive individuals who thrive with others who are highly productive.  If there is a weak link in a group project, a control freak is likely the person to pick up the slack.

Myth #4: Control freaks are bitches. Bitchiness has nothing to do with being a control freak.  Control freaks might get annoyed if decisions aren’t being made, but everyone get irritated.  Being a bitch is a whole other discussion in itself.

Myth #5: Control freaks are insecure. Not all control freaks seek control because they feel like they’ve lost control of themselves.  Quite the contrary.  They may feel insecure in an unorganized situation, but they are not necessarily insecure with themselves.  If they are, it may have nothing to do with their control-freakiness.

Myth #6: Control freaks can’t take criticism. Control freaks strive for the best experiences and overall improvement.  Control freaks understand that they don’t know everything and are willing to learn from others.  They are not always perfectionists, but similar traits may apply.

Myth #7: Control freaks can’t take orders or instruction. Control freaks would love if someone else took the lead! As long as they were taking into account what everyone involved wanted to do (as they would) and they were organized and goal-oriented.

Myth #8: Control freaks are egotistical. Control freaks don’t think they know best. They just know how to get things done.  If you are on a tight schedule, having a control freak on your side will optimize your time.

Myth #9: Control freaks want to control people. Not all control freaks are puppet masters.  Many simply crave order, or the opportunity to create order in a chaotic situation.  Most control freaks know that people can make up their own minds, and they appreciate getting ideas from other people.

If there is anything I have learned from blogging, which sadly is something people have a hard time learning, is how to try to be nonjudgmental.  For those of you who know me personally, you can corroborate my story, and for those of you who have been followers of my blog for a while, you will know that I am not some nasty, manipulative person.  That doesn’t mean the haters won’t always come out.  Lucky for me, I am a control freak, focused on my goals.  Nothing can stop me.